Tuesday, December 6, 2011

The Only Thing You Need To Remember

There is a dark jungle next to a village. People who went into that jungle didn't come out. One day, a few people with torches went in. They were told not to, but they did it anyway. Only a few returned, dying, hurt, betrayed, broken, wounded, and more than a few dead. All of them with bleeding claw marks. Before the remaining ones died, this is what they say:


"Within the Jungle is a Tiger. It is tall, thin, and is the most frightening thing you will know. Its many claws are made of obsidian, and it has the most horrible eyes. But...it is just a Tiger, and it bleeds."


The villagers still fear the Jungle. They still fear the Tiger and take precautions...but they know it is just a Tiger. A creature of Shadows but NOT Unknown. Perhaps one day the Tiger will be slain...it is unlikely. However, there is no need for pointless, soul withering, fear.
It is a monster, but the monster bleeds.

52 comments:

  1. I...

    Robert, if you're still alive, there's something I want to ask you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. My, oh my. You simply will not die. You insist upon these constant returns, my dearest sage, to the point where one can't help but wonder if you aren't just a washed-up writer, making it all up while grasping for a piece of the spotlight that others have truly earned. But certainly this could never be the case.

    The world does not need you, Robert. It's moved far beyond you could have ever imagined. Go back to sleep in death's cold, loving darkness. Let the rest of us work.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Fucking christ. Dead people are coming back.

    Time to grab the guns, folks. The zombie apocalypse is starting!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, my

    Normally, from my understanding, dead people usually stay dead.

    Unless you're a roach. Those buggers never die 'till you hit them juuuuust right~

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  6. Well well well well! Lookie what we have here, a wannabe hero and his empty blog. Where were you when shit went downhill, Sagel? And now you come back trumpeting your own horn which is shoved up your ass where the sun don't shine?

    Have fun with your fucking theories and stupidity. you'll always be the guy singing alone in his hotel room to me. We don't NEED you anymore.

    Just. Go. Die.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ahahahahaha no. Denied. Thanks for playing, better luck next time.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I, uh...

    Oh my. How does he...keep coming back?...

    ReplyDelete
  9. They can do that? I thought it was against the rules.

    ReplyDelete
  10. How sad is it that, from all of you, Ben has the best reply so far?

    Oh, Robbie, Robbie, Robbie... those maggots jerking your corpse across the keyboard again? They have excellent grammar, I must say.

    Zombie Apocalypse isn't until December 21st, 2012, Robert. Until then, let's move on, shall we?

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ah the famous Robert Sagel. Famous for never understanding his time is over.

    I notice the invisible text Robert. Do you fancy yourself a Sage again? People stopped romanticizing others with those titles a long time ago.

    You plunged yourself into death and freefall. Could you finally hit the ground and lie still?

    ReplyDelete
  12. That which bleeds can die.

    If this is indeed Robert Sagel and not some automated post left by a long dead blogger then on behalf of the department I extend an invitation to join us here in Slender Falls. We'd like to compare notes and, if you're interested, point out where you went wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Robbie, it's okay. We have ways of helping people like you.

    Silver bullet through the head, followed by removal of the heart, break the neck, stuff the head with garlic, place a crucifix to the body, douse with holy water, then we'll bury you in the Empty City with a priest (preferably an not-undead one) performing an exorcism. For added protection your body will be placed in a steel coffin, bolted shut and and then tied with chains. And placed roughly twenty feet down, vertically, with the head downward and pine branches (I think that's right) below. Then the Boss comes, cuts off all His energy for a mile radius around the area, ensuring that there will be no Slender-shenanigans to mess with the corpse, and we set up with the Seraphim to keep the other Fears away as well, especially the Archangel and the Dying Man.

    What say?

    ReplyDelete
  14. This is
    interesting

    Talk of
    Monsters.

    Monsters
    make me
    shiver.

    ReplyDelete
  15. So much negativity... and they call ME the judgmental prick? Astounding.

    It seems the story is changing... Interesting. What else has changed, I wonder?

    ReplyDelete
  16. Excuse me while I roll my eyes and not give two fucks about a (dead) man and his decision to pursue his mental dream.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I think I'm gonna call shenanigans on this one, guys. This isn't Robert Sagel. Just some sad fuck jerking us all around. And for once I am being

    completely

    fucking

    SERIOUS.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Oh look, it's zombie Robert again.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Dammit, why did Morningstar 1.0 have to go and die. We were going to go Zombie Robert hunting last time this happened.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Don't worry Omega, Star left me all his zombie hunting supplies. We should get a group together before it turns into an epidemic

    ReplyDelete
  21. Ooh, can I come? I promise to stop killing people (who aren't zombies, who aren't people anyway) until we're done!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Zombies?
    Ooh, maybe
    Salome and I
    could...

    Never mind,
    we would never
    get clearance...

    ReplyDelete
  23. "but the monster bleeds."

    Given the amount of bullets, sharp objects, tonnage of explosives, and various other killing implements (both magical and mundane) I've directed at it without any visible effect, forgive me if I find myself doubting that statement.

    Also I'm totally down for any zombie hunting.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Only the fool doesn't know when to give up.

    In this case, you are the fool. Quite possibly a zombie fool.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I dunno you guys, but I already have enough with Slendy. I'm not about to deal with an effing zombie apocalypse...

    ReplyDelete
  26. The only thing you need to remember is the fact that my foot is going to lodge so far up your ass if you come near my family and I again, that you will fly to fucking Mars and NASA will be able to see you in the goddamn stars.

    ReplyDelete
  27. ...... Seriously! Who the fuck are you!?!?

    ReplyDelete
  28. Whoever it is appears to have purged the blog.. again.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Ah, the famous and infamous Robert Sagel. Another return to the living? Or have you been keeping your secrets from us again?

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hey Robert, if you're restarting the Core Theory could you throw in some of these: http://atragicallywonderfulparadox.blogspot.com/2011/11/prophecies-of-madman.html. Heh, I even threw in the role of zombie, just for you (I mean, come on, how many times have you died anyways?).

    See you around
    -Cage

    ReplyDelete
  31. The WHOLE BLOG has been deleted? Really? Aye.. aye. Must be awkward over at your end. Maybe Robert here is the real tiger.

    [of course, my Tiger and his tiger are completely different; though they both do seem quite fit, and have a liking for suits]

    ReplyDelete
  32. I'm trying to figure out if ol Robert is more of a Smoker or a Boomer. I'm leaning towards a Boomer, but they don't have the range or grappling skills of the Smoker...

    ReplyDelete
  33. You should all remember
    In the land of the mortal
    The Undying man is King.

    These are strange eons indeed.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Seriously? Zombie jokes. Nothing but *fucking* zombie jokes. I had a lot more faith in you than that, internet. But nope, you went right for the obvious and easy humor. You make me *sick*.

    ReplyDelete
  35. M said you were dead and crazy.But how can you make posts if you are dead/?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's best not to ponder it too hard. You can attest that our mutual Tallish Friend has a tendency towards the impossible.
      Sane and reasonable assumptions begin to escape you the longer you hang around people like us, but you'll get used to it.

      Oh wait. That's not such a good thing, is it...

      Delete
  36. undead people, who generate this much contempt from the blogosphere only segal, to bad the previous champion has lived long enough to see himself become the villan it appears.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Things clearly are not(can not) be as simple as they seem.
    I guess they never were.
    Or ever will be...

    ReplyDelete
  38. Never stays down for long, does he? Admirable and pitiable all at the same time.

    Still waiting for word from Redlight, GOD OF MACHINES again. :P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MAN have I been out for a long time. Welp, he's not a GOD OF MACHINES (shame, really), and his signoff's different, but from the sound of it, the light's turned red once again.

      Delete
  39. Robert, not you, you-you were like our Rorshach! Oh, and Red Light, bite me man.

    ReplyDelete
  40. He's not alive. He's dead. The Show's over.

    And when dealing with the dead, always remember: "It's a trick, Get an axe."

    ReplyDelete
  41. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  42. its okay Redlights dead forever and alltimes by me now dont worery of it or him worry of Slenderthulu and Megamegacosmicrake

    ReplyDelete
  43. Its confirmed.

    Robert's immortal.

    ReplyDelete
  44. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  45. The Tiger does not bleed. It turns the world red.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Hello. I... need help. As much as I hate to admit it, I'm a mite out of my depth here, and I am now aware of some force other than the //construct// referred to by the apparently deceased Robert((Sage)) I have come to admire.

    It worries me, and I would rather not be worried alone.

    Is there anyone else left?

    ReplyDelete